YSunday, January 7, 2007

Of Cheesy Cheers and Disgraceful Dances

Okay. By now, I'm sure those of you who have read the previous posts of my blog would have realized that it's somewhat different from the millions of other blogs managed by those intelligent enough to operate a mouse and keyboard. To a large extent, I don't talk about my life. The reason for this is simple. It's not because I want to be different and special, neither is it because I want to be a rebel, and it's most definitely not because I like to stir up trouble and piss people off. Simply, the reason is that, well, I think my life is boring. To be truthful, I find pretty much everyone's life to be uninteresting. Indeed. Let's be honest. Having to read about other people going to school, watching movies, and eating lunch is a tedious task. There are, of course, exceptions to this. George Bush would be one of them, but from what I hear of his intelligence, I would prefer a third-hand account.

So, today, in the spirit of spontaneity, I will try something different. I'm going to try to write about my boring life, and make seem interesting, so that even total strangers would start to care about my insignificant existence. Hidden somewhere in the midst my fluffy language and long long LONG introduction, my basic point is: I'm trying something new, it might suck. Don't be pissed.

Let's begin. On Wednesday I started a new term of school at a new school. Since I was/am a Josephian, one would expect me to go to CJC. However, for reasons unknown even to myself, I chose to go to ACJC. Thus begins a portion of my life, where there are many fascinating changes. I was formerly at the top of the totem pole in SJI, but now in ACJC, I've become the lowly piece of crap at the bottom. Furthermore, I don't know where anything is, I have only about 20 other SJI boys who followed in my path, and I'm surrounded by faces that I don't recognize.

Boring speeches began my Orientation. You know the kind. The kind where the more polite members of the audience will stare at the speaker, glassy-eyed, with only little snippets of information being remembered, others will shake their legs and give out sighs of exasperation. Those who just don't care take advantage of the air-con to get several valuable minutes of shut-eye, some with heads tilted slightly forward, with slow steady breathing, while others have their heads rolled back, snoring conspicuously. The events that followed were even more.. awkward. We were split up into smaller groups of 20. Relatively smaller, considering there were nearly 900 J1s. What followed was a lot of staring at feet, fidgeting, arms scratching, and other displays of general discomfort. Now, I know I'm not really great at making new friends instantly, so I keep kinda quiet until I get accustomed to my surroundings. However, I was further silenced by another fact. There were so many girls around. My SJI brain couldn't comprehend it. I was like, "Wow, I didn't know so many girls existed". It's sad, but four years at a boys school has made me into a n00b.

Okay, even I can tell this post is getting boring. Let's skip ahead to the juicy bits. So we feel shy, play games together, cheer together, suddenly we become more open and more like our usual selves. Yay. So anyway, one thing I found out about ACJC, is that they really enjoy cheering. I mean, they really do. During orientation, we play games. Before we play a game, we cheer. After the game is over, we cheer. After all that's done, we go for mass cheer.

I don't think I'll be able to speak properly ever again.

At first, I wasn't really all that into cheering. That is probably because I'm somewhat of a prick. But after a while, I just realized I should make the best of any situation. Throwing caution to the wind, with my newfound attitude, and the "When in Rome" mentality, I just began to cheer. At first, I felt like a moron. This was due, in part, no doubt, to some of the inane lyrics I was chanting with my fellow ACSian. (Sidetrack, it's pronounced ACK-xi-ian. Or something like that.) Here is an excerpt.

F-I-R-E! We're so hot we make you pee!

I told you.

Anyway, after a while, I came to the conclusion, that there are times when a person should act like a moron. And that, was exactly what I did. Shout. Leap in the air. Dance. What a sight it was. A sea of 900 young adults acting like high idiotic freaks. This has taught me that perhaps, just perhaps, you can get anyone to do just about anything, if you're able to get an apathetic avenger to scream random crap voluntarily.

Another part of the Orientation was the Mass Dance. Apparently, many JCs in Singapore have decided that they would like to further embarrass and make orientation even more awkward than it already was. Thus, they decided the best way to do so, would be to force all the JC1s to dance together in one mass. (Hence, mass dance) First, they would have to dance alone, and when they thought that the humiliation would end there, they would be in for the shock of their lives! They would then be made to dance in pairs, one guy, and one girl. (This is no longer SJI. Thank God.) Now, this experience has taught me another very important life lesson. The lesson is that I have zero ability in body movement. It is only by sheer luck and the grace of god that I'm able to walk without falling flat on my face. Most of you probably think I'm just exaggerating for effect, but, I'm not. Sure, I can remember the steps, I can memorize. But when I try to replicate the moves I've been taught, its like, pain. The souls of millions of dancers scream out in agony, their minds tortured by the sight of my grotesque moves.

Orientation ends in smoke and flames. LITERALLY! We have a campfire. (It's a joke, a sad one, but still a joke.) The campfire is a pretty standard, where we sing songs and do more cheering. It was pretty fun, except for one unfortunate part. One of the events, was an imitation of the popular TV show "Whose Line Is It Anyway?", but only, not funny. You can't expect comedy from non-comedians. Students were picked at random, and expected to come up with some hilarious skit right then and there. You can't teach this sort of thing. Some have it, some don't. It's a skill. Like dancing.

The final event of the campfire, was of course, the mass dance. As we were about to begin, I cringed. I just wanted to get it over with. The music starts. After a few moments, I came upon a wonderful sight. Many other people were just as bad, if not worse, than I was. Alright! I don't suck that much! After that, I began to actually enjoy the dance. After the song ended, it was repeated again. I smiled.

Alright. That's the end. It may seem rather long, but remember, it contains 4 days worth of information squeezed into a 10minute essay. This isnt't my best work, but considering the material I had to work with, I would like to think I did a pretty good job.

Go ACJC.

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