YSunday, December 31, 2006

New Year's Day.

As I write this, its not quite New Year's Day yet. One would expect me to be wearing some stupid party hat, half-empty bottle of vodka in my hand, writhing around in some primitive form of dance, amongst a gyrating mass of sweaty fragrant young people, as we play in foam, counting down the minutes. However, I do not feel any sense of elation or joyousness. On the contrary, I feel a sense of indifference. Put rather crudely, I don't give a damn. I am, after all, the apathetic avenger. This lack of interest is a vast contrast to the state of mind others may be in as of this moment.

People dance around. Sing. Count drunkenly. Yay. Dance some more. Sing badly off-key. Drink more. Count backwards. 5... 4... 3... 2... 1... Woo. Loud noises. Annoying piercing screams. Frenzied jumping. Stare at the sky. See fireworks. Keep dancing. Become tired. Go home. Sleep.

One is expected to be at least somewhat interested in the coming of a New Year. But no matter how hard I try, I can't help but feel there is no reason to celebrate. Interesting sidetrack, did you know that New Year's Day wasn't always celebrated on the 1st of January? In like, medieval Europe, the 1st of April was New Year's Day. Essentially, it was the Old New Year's Day. Laugh. But then in like mid 1500s, the French wanted to screw with everyone, and changed New Year's Day to the one that we use today. As a result April Fool's Day was also born. This is how it started. On the 1st of April, mid 1500s + 1 year, this peasant, who forget that the French King wanted to screw with everyone, said to his fellow peasant, "Happy New Year!". The fellow French peasant, being the prick that he was, proceeded to point, and laugh, at his ignorant peasant friend, and said, "Haha! New Year's Day was 4 months ago! You suck! n0013!!!11!!!!11!!!eleven! You're such a fool!". Yes, that was how it began.

Anyway, back on topic. I find celebrating New Year's Day to be... ludicrous. It's a new year. Big deal. It doesn't have any special meaning. If I wanted to be especially calculating, I would say "Years were created as a method to simplify the telling of time. After all, the only thing a year signifies is the time it takes the Earth to revolve around the Sun, 365.25 days. So, we say, the first time I tried smoking was about 4 years ago, instead of, the first time I tried smoking was about 1461 days ago. Much simpler, isn't it?" Yes, that was what I would say if I wanted to be especially calculating. But I'm not, so I won't.

Now, I don't mind at all if someone told me that they thought of the New Year as just another excuse to party, to have a good time, to be surrounded by friends and family, to be happy, I wouldn't mind. If fact, I would think they were making a good decision. But it's when people tell me things, foolish things, like the New Year represents "whole new possibilities", "turning over a new leaf", "new beginnings" or some other hocus pocus mumbo jumbo, I get annoyed. Very annoyed. That's bullshit. A new year doesn't signify anything. It's just another day. Some people will be very annoyed with what I say. "New Year is a time when you make resolutions and make yourself a better person! Stupid!

I would reply, once again, with "That's bullshit.". Yes. Why must you make new year resolutions? Why can't you make June 23rd resolutions? Why not September 14th resolutions? Are you only allowed to think of improvements to yourself once in 365 days? If you can think of things to improve, must you wait until 1st of January to start? Don't make excuses for laziness. If you want to do something, do it.

See the true meaning of New Year's Day. An inane reason, but a reason nonetheless, to have a public holiday. As I finish this post, a new year has begun. Crap, now I must remember to write 2007 instead of 2006 for dates. I always forget.

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Blogged @ 10:47 PM